Oct 102008
 

This is a call on all religious groups that have been led astray by the current debate over a menial matter. This is only part of the Liberal-Gay agenda, to guide is away from the issues that truly matter!

We must all band together and get back our right to have slaves! And to stone adulterers! Those rights, God-given and explicitly allowed and even commanded in the Bible. Abraham held slaves! Who are you to say that Abraham was wrong? Who are you to say that Noah was wrong to banish his grandson and his descendants to slavery and make it easy for you to tell who they are by colouring them black? We have been misled and have let the liberals make slavery illegal and look where that has led us! To women’s rights as equal to men, and to the current debate to gay marriage.

Rise and recognize the folly of your ways, it was a slippery slope to let the liberals abolish slavery, and gay marriage is what was next! Remember! No society has lasted with an “anything goes” attitude. We must push this line of liberal encroachment on the Bible back and get back our God-given rights to have sex slaves!

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In case you’re wondering, this is a satirical parody, a form I’m revisiting after a long while. I am parodying arguments originally found at iProtect Marriage.com. I love that site, because they went back to everything Hollywood and major advertising knows about influencing young people and used it for their own goals. If you check out the video called “A Fine Line”, you will see a young teenage heartthrob leading prayers and speaking. You can also find them on social networking sites like myspace, facebook and twitter. It’s quite amusing how they don’t miss a beat.

Before anyone makes assumptions about my own positions on religion or gay marriage, etc, I want to assert that my point is to simply expose one type of argument that ends up being abused: that the Bible is a final, literal and assertive moral authority. Societies change. Slavery is totally hated now (for good reason) and yet allowed in the Bible. If you’re going to take a literal, all-inclusive reading of the Bible, then make sure you get into the parts with the slavery and the sex slaves, and fight for your right to do that today. Otherwise you risk being an inconsistent hypocrit, which, of course, isn’t all that bad a thing if you’re not interested in being rational. You can find some interesting points about following the Bible literally at this TED talk by AJ Jacobs, author of The Year of Living Biblically:

Other than the blatant hatred of the following page, they do have an interesting point of what sort of family values the Bible promotes with regards to using marriage to bond a man forever or sex slaves.

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