- Principle of People Equivalence: “Other people are like you.”
- Implications of this principle: most people have very similar fears and reactions as you do; most people don’t think about you as much as you think they do.
- So: Don’t be afraid of strangers, because you’re a stranger to them and most people in general are nice people. Don’t be afraid of make a fool of yourself, because no body cares enough about you to think about you very much at all.
The principle of people equivalence is one of my favourite principles for understanding and interacting with other people. It essentially says, “Other people are like very much like you.” That may not come as a big surprise at first blush, but I’d like you to think about the implications of it.
Many people have very similar fears and reactions as you do. The steady and fairly homogenus diet of mass media that we have all been on since we were born or children has created a society that thinks pretty damn similarly. Most people are ridiculously similar. Many people fear talking to strangers, even though those strangers also fear talking to strangers, which in this case is YOU.
Most people don’t really think about you as much as you think they do, pretty much no matter what you do. Afraid of making a complete fool of yourself? Its not the complete fool part that scares you, its the idea that you wouldn’t be able to handle the negative criticism if someone saw you.Ã‚Â If you had to do something strange like strut around tall and high and yell like Tarzan, but I could garuntee that no one would hear you or see you (say you were in space in a box), I think you’d be a lot more comfortable with it than if you were in the middle of Times Square in New York.
So, what’s the equivalence principle here? Think about the last time someone made a complete fool of them around you. How long did you think about it? If it was a just a random stranger on the street? Even if it was a close friend, how often do you think about it? I’ve made a complete fool of myself and I’ve seen people make complete fools of themselves but I really don’t remember it or think about it.
Get off your high horse, no body cares about you as much as you think they do. :p
Seriously though, what do you spend most of your time thinking about? I’m willing to wager you mostly think about you or things related to you. You probably spend very little time thinking about other people.